A Brief Reflection

Awoke before dawn. Soon the sky lightened and I could tell there would be some blue today. But the western sky is already full of those puffy clouds that will turn on you in an instant.

A number of people have asked or said something about me contacting BP. First, I am a pretty small fish here. I suppose I could get close to someone, but what would I even ask? What would I say? I could simply record, but I don't want to hear their words first hand. It is disgusting enough to see their faces on TV. Rich, rich men who don't really have a clue what the 4th generation fishermen are so upset about. "They can fish somewhere else," is their attitude.

These rich men will walk away from here one day. So will I. The difference is they will be out at some $200 a plate restaurant complaining about how people didn't understand how hard they were trying. I will be in a $5 taqueria weeping for the dead wildlife.

In effect, I will never walk away. Though I haven't seen the destruction first hand, I have seen the misery in people's faces, the rage that is barely under control, the terror of what is to come. And I am a changed woman. New Orleans will be a part of me fore the rest of my life.

And not just New Orleans. When I say the name of this city, I mean this whole coastal area that is under siege by oil and men and cameras once again. I think the people here got sick of those big TV trucks during Katrina, and they are not a welcome sight again. They only mean a new disaster has struck.

So, I will not talk to anyone at BP. I don't want to spend my energy that way. The "drill baby drill" mentality is so far from who I am that I don't want to be very close to the people who live that life. I don't want to be close to the people who pay lobbyists to keep a tight hold on federal regulations so they can have more profit.

I know, you think I'm not much of a reporter. I could do it, though. I could come up with the questions. I could nod appropriately. Or scowl, more likely. But being here with this immense paid is difficult enough, and I don't choose to make it worse by having to look those people in the face.

Around half a million dollars would have paid for automatic shutoff devices that would have prevented this disaster. BP (and other companies) had their lobbyists work Congress to keep those devices from becoming regulation. You have to sleep with the devil to think that was the right thing to do.